By Julianna Dubendorff (Gourmet Extraordinare)
Easiness: ✭✭✭✭ Dorm-Friendliness: ✭✭✫✫
A RECIPE FOR DISASTER
Charles and David Koch’s political network plans to spend nearly $889 million backing conservative advocacy groups and think tanks during the 2016 presidential elections. This figure far surpasses the $657 million that the Republic National Committee and the party’s two congressional campaign committees spent on the 2012 elections. It’s also at around the same level as what each major political party is predicted to spend in the 2016 election. Given this, the Koch brothers’ network could almost be considered its own political party—that of the billionaire class.
1 Devil’s food cake, mix 3 eggs, 1 ¼ cups Coke-a-Cola, 1 bag marshmallows, 6 oz. chocolate chips
- Make cake according to corporate agenda (box directions) but replace a just democracy (water) with millions of dollars of Koch cash (coke).
- Incubate at corporate agenda’s direction (temperature according to the box) until the earth’s average temperature has risen by 15 degrees.
- Pour oil (chocolate chips) on the cake.
- Sprinkle the old, white, conservative members of Congress owned by the Kochs (marsh- mallows) on top of the cake.
- Put cake back into the oven on broil until browned, or until Florida Governor Rick Scott admits that climate change is real, whichever comes first.